Happy Holidays!!!!
On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my Significant Other
in a consenting adult, monogamous relationship gave to me:
TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming,
ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in good standing
of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their union contract even though they will
not be asked to play a note),
TEN melanin deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal ruling class system
leaping,
NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression,
EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from enslaved
Bovine-Americans,
SEVEN endangered swans swimming on federally protected wetlands,
SIX enslaved Fowl-Americans producing stolen non-human animal products,
FIVE golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic incarceration,
(NOTE: after members of the Animal Liberation Front threatened to throw red paint at my
computer, the calling birds, French hens and partridge have been reintroduced to their
native habitat. To avoid further Animal-American
enslavement, the remaining gift package has been revised.)
FOUR hours of recorded whale songs
THREE deconstructionist poets
TWO Sierra Club calendars printed on recycled processed tree carcasses and...
ONE Spotted Owl activist chained to an old-growth pear tree.
Merry Christmas. Happy Chanukah. Good Kwanzaa. Blessed Yule. Happy Holidays!!!!
(unless otherwise prohibited by law) *
*Unless, of course, you are suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).
If this be the case, please substitute this gratuitous call for celebration with suggestion that
you have a thoroughly adequate day.
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