HEADLINE HITCHES

Some story headlines don’t convey quite the concept the journalist undoubtedly intended... with some amusing results. Here are some actual newspaper headlines featuring an inadvertent play on words.

FIRE OFFICIALS GRILLED OVER KEROSENE HEATERS

LEGISLATORS TAX BRAINS TO CUT DEFICIT

POLICE BEGIN CAMPAIGN TO RUN DOWN JAYWALKERS

EXPERTS SAY SCHOOL BUS PASSENGERS SHOULD BE BELTED

FARMER BILL DIES IN HOUSE

HIGH COURT TO HEAR MARIJUANA CASE

LOCAL HIGH SCHOOL DROPOUTS CUT IN HALF

BUXOM STARLET KNOCKED FLAT BY FANS

HOSPITALS ARE SUED BY 7 FOOT DOCTORS

BAR HELPING ALCOHOLIC LAWYERS

ASTRONAUT TAKES BLAME FOR GAS IN SPACECRAFT

ENRAGED COW INJURES FARMER WITH AX

SQUAD HELPS DOG BITE VICTIM

STEALS CLOCK, FACES TIME

STUD TIRES OUT

REAGAN WINDS UP BUDGET BUT MORE LIES AHEAD

STOLEN PAINTING FOUND BY TREE

WAR DIMS HOPE FOR PEACE

SCHOOL TAXPAYERS REVOLTING

PROSECUTOR RELEASES PROBE INTO UNDERSHERIFF

BRITISH LEFT WAFFLES ON VIRGIN ISLANDS

ENFIELDS COUPLE SLAIN; POLICE SUSPECT HOMICIDE

RED TAPE HOLDS UP NEW BRIDGE

NEW STUDY OF OBESITY LOOKS FOR LARGER TEST GROUP

ARSON SUSPECT HELD IN MASSACHUSETTS FIRE

EYE DROPS OFF SHELF

AIR HEAD FIRED

DRUNK GETS NINE MONTHS IN VIOLIN CASE

JUVENILE COURT TO TRY SHOOTING DEFENDANT

NEW VACCINE MAY CONTAIN RABIES

COLD WAVE LINKED TO TEMPERATURES

BAN ON SOLICITING DEAD IN TROTWOOD

TYPHOON RIPS THROUGH CEMETERY; HUNDREDS DEAD

OLD SCHOOL PILLARS REPLACED BY ALUMNI

SEX EDUCATION DELAYED; TEACHERS REQUEST TRAINING

IRAQI HEAD SEEKS ARMS

DEER KILL l7,000

NATIONAL HUNTING GROUP TARGETING WOMEN

MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH

LANSING RESIDENTS CAN DROP OFF TREES

TEACHER STRIKES IDLE KIDS

SISTERS REUNITED AFTER 18 YEARS AT CHECKOUT COUNTER

PANDA MATING FAILS, VETERINARIAN TAKES OVER

MAN STRUCK BY LIGHTNING FACES BATTERY CHARGE

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